


december 22nd: a mothers secrets

by watergator



Series: december fic advent 2018 [22]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 19:19:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17106587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watergator/pseuds/watergator
Summary: prompt: trick or treatingdan's mum has a chat with phil





	december 22nd: a mothers secrets

It always feels weird, stepping into the threshold of Dan’s old family house; no longer are all the people who once lived here mingling around the house anymore, only Dan’s mum and the family dog, Colin. The wallpaper is different and fresher and the carpet Phil remembers stumbling across that night they came back from the Halloween gathering with alcohol on their breaths and whispered voices, has since been pulled up and replaced with shiny Beachwood flooring, making a tapping sound when Colin skitters across it to greet both Dan and Phil as they let themselves in.

Karen greets them with open arms, to which Dan walks into, giving her a tight hug.   
  
“Hi mum,” he mumbles as she squeezes him, finally letting him go to move towards Phil.  
  
Phil swings his backpack over his shoulder awkwardly as she pulls him in, having to reach up on her tippy toes to get her arms around his shoulders, much like she’d done with Dan.  
  
“Tea, boys?” She asks with delight in her voice once she’s detached herself from Phil.  
  
Dan nods, “Sure. Phil, come upstairs and put our crap in our room?”   
  
_Our room._  
  
Technically it’s Dan’s room. Dan’s room practically from birth till he was eighteen. The brown walls have since been painted over in a nice pale blue. _Duck egg_ , he thinks Karen told him, and the plain dresser and single bed have been replaced with a nice, sturdier twin bed and a dresser that looks like it’d perhaps been purchased from Ikea.  
  
“Ugh,” Dan moans, dropping his bag onto the bed with a thud. “This bed’ll kill my back. We’re gonna be squished for the next three days,” he sighs.  
  
He knows Dan’s not really complaining; really the bed is big enough for the two of them, but years of having the luxury of their queen sized bed at home where Dan could roll around and flap his arms and legs in his sleep without (almost) disturbing Phil’s sleep had perhaps made them a little selfish.  
  
“Don’t be a baby,” Phil says as he slips his shoes off his feet and kicks them beside the door. “Your mum’s done this room up lovely,” he remarks.  
  
She has. It seems far from a boy’s teenage bedroom and now a simple guest room. Their guest room.  
  
Dan scoffs. “I’m back in my old teenage bedroom, Phil, I’ll be as angsty and whiny as I want.”  
  
Phil laughs. “Let’s go downstairs before your mum thinks we’re up to something up here,” Phil says, pulling Dan by the arm towards the door.  
  
Dan scrunches his nose up. “Ew,” he mutters.  
  
Once downstairs, Karen is sat at the round kitchen table with three mugs of tea in each seat.  
  
“You boys all good?” She asks once they’ve joined her. Phil smiles warmly at her as he takes his tea and has a small sip.  
  
“Mmh hm,” Dan hums with a small sip of his own tea. “Train was a nightmare,” he says.  
  
“Always is,” Karen mutters into her mug. “Manage to bump into anyone?” She asks with a glint in her eyes.   
  
Dan sets his tea down against the table with a scoff. “No, thank fuck. Me and Phil had to ninja ourselves out of there, so I don’t think anyone saw us, but if they had I’d just pretend that I didn’t see them or know them,” he adds.  
  
Karen laughs, loudly, and it makes Phil think of the way that sometimes Dan laughs like that; loud and surprising.   
  
“You would as well. You’d go all bloody celebrity on them and act as if you had no idea who they were, as if you didn’t spend a good five years with them in school,” she grins.  
  
Phil watches the way Dan’s face scrunches up with disgust at the ‘C’ word.  
  
“Mum, don’t ever say the word ‘celebrity’ in reference to me again. God,” he says with a sour looking frown as he picks up his mug again, bringing it to his lips. “It actually hurts me, you know.”  
  
Phil laughs and takes his own drink of his tea. It’s always strange coming to Dan’s family house with him, it’s like Dan is an extension of himself here with his mum. He remembers what he’d said during the mukbang video, and how he had different faces for different people and at the time Phil hadn’t quite understood; but with Karen and the rest of Dan’s family, Phil had managed to piece it together slowly.  
  
With Phil, Dan was Dan. He was the truest example of himself. He was the open, loud, bossy, sometimes and quite often pain in the ass, Dan. His most comfortable version of himself. Phil liked to think that was the real Dan, or at least, the realest.   
  
With Phil’s own family, Dan was still comfortable. He had no problem in telling Phil to shut up after a particularly crappy joke in front of Kath without having to worry about being scolded. But there was still that reserved part of him. The part that would happily volunteer to the mountain of dishes in the kitchen that Phil knew Dan would never offer to help with had it just been the two of them in their own London apartment.  
  
And with Dan’s mum, it’s like Dan’s honesty setting perhaps goes a little wild. He’ll be as open and honest as he is in front of Phil, but with a little more aggression. He’ll tell it how it is with her, with his dad and even his brother. It’s not out of cruelty or being rude; he knows Dan loves his mum, and she loves him back. But they’re so similar that Dan doesn’t have an problem in being blunt with her in a way he knows she won’t get hurt or upset from it.  
  
Karen laughs from Dan’s last remark and shakes her head. “Sorry Phil. Not sorry to Dan though,” she grins leaning over to Phil to give him a wink.  
  
She really does remind him of Dan at the best of times.  
  
Dan makes a sound of disgust in the back of his throat. “I need to pee. Don’t bitch too much about me whilst I’m gone,” he says standing up suddenly.  
  
Karen grins. “Do you need me to tell you where the bathroom is? I’d suspect you’d forget after not being back home in so long?”  
  
Dan rolls his eyes but the corner of his lips turn up into a small smile. “Don’t need to reminders as to why I avoid this hell hole,” he tells her, spinning around and leaving the room. Phil hears the heavy thuds of his footsteps as he climbs up the stairs. He smiles to himself.  
  
Karen takes a sip of her tea. “Bastard child he is. Literally and figuratively. Not sure how or why you put up with him,” she says with a shake of her head.  
  
He tries to image his own mum saying that about him to Dan. He knows it’s only her dry sense of humour, but it’s still strange and foreign.  
  
He forces a laugh ad shrugs his shoulders. “It’s a struggle. Most the time, anyways,” he tries to joke back.  
  
He likes Karen but it’s a lot easier to talk to her when Dan’s beside him to throw in the odd sarcastic comment and just watch the abusive banter between them ping pong.  
  
“So how’re you doing after the tour? Bet your knackered huh?” she asks and Phil nods quickly.  
  
“Yeah, it was really good. Really good. Glad to be home now though,” he tells her with a genuine smile. She smiles back.  
  
“Yeah, nothing quite like home, is there?” she says with a smile, cupping her hands around her mug tightly. Phil’s eyes drift to look over at where her wedding ring should sit. Instead, it’s a bare finger.  
  
That’s still weird for him. He wonders if it’s strange that it’s weirder for him than it is for Dan, considering it’s actually his parents. He doesn’t bring it up though. Neither of them do.  
  
“You still thinking of moving then?” she asks, and Phil wonders what the hell Dan could be possibly doing that’s taking so long but he smiles politely and nods.   
  
“Yeah, we think so. The apartment is nice but it’s not really… homely.”  
  
Karen hums and nods her head. Her long hair falls over her shoulders and she tucks it back behind her ear. Phil notices that she hasn’t any greying hair yet. That or she does a good job of dyeing it like his own mother does.  
  
“Yeah, we’ve had this bloody shack for, god, almost twenty eight years,” she says looking around the kitchen. Phil looks around with her for some reason.  
  
“Yeah, blimey, twenty eight years. That’s gotta make it homely enough, don’t you think?” she asks with a laugh.  
  
Phil nods, peering down into his tea and how it swirls into shades of brown. “Yeah. I think so.”  
  
They both take long sips of their beverages when Karen speaks up.  
  
“Bloody hell. What the hell is he doing up there? He best not be ruining my bathroom, I’ve just had it done you know,” she tuts, and Phil actually laughs.  
  
“The house looks lovely, by the way. Looks nice.” He tells her, and she sits up a little looking a little pleased with herself.  
  
“Thank you. It was well overdue for a touch of love. I’d been going on about getting that awful wallpaper stripped down for years but if you want something done sometimes you gotta bugger people out of it and do yourself,” she tells him with a wag of her finger.

It feels like talking to Dan. It’s something he’d say, something he’d probably said before, and it makes Phil wonder if the two of them honestly know how alike in personalities they are to each other.  
  
They hear the sounding of stomping footsteps above them and Karen shakes her head. “Here comes trouble,” she mutters with a smirk as the footsteps grow louder and closer.  
  
“Go on then” Dan’s voice enters the room before Phil even sees him. “Carry on with your bitch fest about me. Pretend I’m not here,” he says as he sits back down.  
  
Phil laughs and gives his foot a small kick under the table. “We weren’t bitching. I was just saying how lovely the house looks.” Phil tells him. “Your mum’s done a good job.”  
  
Maybe he’s sucking up just a little for future mother-in-law points, but if Dan’s allowed to do it, then so is he.  
  
Dan see’s right through this and laughs loudly, “Yeah, glad that you finally decorated my disgusting room after I’d moved out of it,” he remarks, picking his tea back up.  
  
Karen snorts a laugh and shakes her head at him. “Daniel, darling that gold room was your idea after all.”  
  
“I think it was more brown than gold. Who let me do that?”   
  
Phil laughs this time. “My parents let me have bright green carpet. Must be a parent thing to let your kid choose hideous bedroom décor and let them suffer with it throughout their teens.”  
  
Karen seems to find it funny as she laughs, her eyes squinting just like Dan’s. Phil smiles warmly at her then at Dan who gives him a fond look.  
  
“What the hell was you doing up there anyways?” she asks, “Better not have ruined anything up there,” she warns, but all three of them know she’s joking.  
  
“Looking at that god awful shell photo frame you have in there. Why the hell did you put mine and Adrian’s baby pictures in the bathroom?” he asks with a raise of his brow.  
  
Karen pretends to look hurt. “It’s nice. Leave my bathroom décor alone.”  
  
Dan laughs dryly. “Looks weird. Imagine when someone comes over and uses the bathroom to take a shit and all they can think about is how they’re staring right at a photo of me when I couldn’t even use a toilet yet.”  
  
It’s a bad time to have another mouthful of tea because Phil’s almost coughing it back up.  
  
Karen raises her brows at him with a smirk. “Be quiet. You’re making my guest choke. You alright Phil, love?” Karen asks with a gentle hand on his shoulder. Phil nods and wipes his chin with the back of his throat.  
  
“God, Dan. You almost made me die,” he says with a shake of his head and he continues wiping at where tea dribbles down his face. Dan leans back in his chair and smirks a cat-like grin.  
  
“Just saying mum, you might wanna throw that ugly sea shell photo out.”  
  
Karen frowns at him. “I’ll do no such thing. Besides I just bought a load of frames the other day, your dad bought round a big box of photos he had and I was thinking of maybe putting some up around the house.”  
  
Phil watches the way Dan’s smile seems to falter for a moment at the mention of his dad, but he grins again quickly, “And by around the house you mean in the bathroom? Phil, does Kath have any photos in her bathroom by any chance? Am I the only one that’s finding this weird?”  
  
Phil laughs and Karen shrugs her shoulders.   
  
“I don’t think so, although next time I see her I might tell her about it. Maybe she can have one of me and Martyn in the guest bathroom,” he says with a grin just to annoy Dan further, who groans in response.  
  
“Maybe we should have one of me in our bathroom?” Phil adds, and Dan sits up and barks a sharp laugh,  
  
“Yeah, only because you’re an actual shit.”  
  
Phil pretends to be offended. “Rude.”  
  
“Told you he was a bastard,” Karen adds quietly. Dan just scoffs at her and Phil giggles.  
  
“So these photos then, not any incriminating ones of me, are there?” Dan asks, looking over at his mum.  
  
Karen finishes off her tea and sets the empty mug against the table. “A fair few. A good collection of bath photos.”  
  
Dan groans. “We don’t need any more bath photos of me. Enough is enough.” He whines dramatically.  
  
“Alright, I won’t get the bath photos out. I’ll spare Phil for now, although, well – actually I won’t say that,” she bites her lip to stop herself from smiling and Phil can feel his cheeks turn pink.  
  
Dan goes the same. “Oh my god, mum, whatever disgusting thing you were about to say about your son and his boyfriend who is sat right here, by the way, you better not,” Dan says, his voice loud and high.   
  
Karen laughs, tipping her head back, and Phil can only laugh along with her. “Sorry. Real sorry this time. Sorry Phil,” she chuckles and Phil shakes his head with a small laugh.  
  
Karen really is a whole person away from his own mother. She wouldn’t make dirty jokes to embarrass her son, she wouldn’t call him names just to wind him up or push his buttons because she knows what it takes to make him tick. But he likes Karen nonetheless, he likes her. Since the day he was awkwardly introduced to his new boyfriend’s younger mother they’d always gotten on. They weren’t as close as they could have been and that was partially down to the fact that they rarely saw each other enough, but he liked Karen.  
  
She’s still laughing at her own joke when she suddenly claps her hands together, making both boys jump in their seats a little.  
  
“Dan, honey would you run up to my room and bring me down the blue box. It’s on my bed, there’s some things I need to you to sort out before you go,” she tells him and Dan frowns at her confused.  
  
“Mum, we only just got here,” he says. “Trying to chuck us out already?” he asks.  
  
Karen grins at him. “Oh so you are staying?” he voice is over the top and dramatic, “This isn’t just your usual two minute stop, no?”  
  
Dan stands from his chair and clicks his tongue. “Blue box you said?”  
  
She smiles sweetly at him. “On my bed, darling.”  
  
Dan thuds back up the stairs and Phil finishes off his tea.  
  
“Can’t be doing with his old crap lingering around the house any longer,” Karen tells him as she gets up and takes both mugs to the sink. Phil’s about to offer to help wash up but she throws them in and leaves them for later.   
  
He watches her walk the short distance to the open living room, carrying in a plastic tub in her arms with a mischievous grin on her face.   
  
“Besides, needed him to piss off for a moment,” she says in a hushed voice as she sets the box down onto the table and Phil watches in confusion.  
  
He says nothing but watches her pry it open, and once the lid comes off does Phil see it’s full of photographs.   
  
“If I do remember him saying on a certain video, there was a particular halloween costume he mentioned, no?” she grins wide, a sparkle in her brown, familiar eyes.  
  
Phil has to hold back a laugh. “Oh my god. You have the photo?” he asks leaning across the table in eagerness.   
  
Karen nods with a grin. “Don’t tell him, Phil. He’ll kill me if he knows I showed you.” she whispers and Phil nods to secretary.  
  
Moments later when Dan stomps back down the stairs he frowns at the sight of his boyfriend and his mum giggling quietly to themselves.  
  
“What’re you two doing? And there was no poxy blue box on your bed, by the way,” he tells her, sitting back down.  
  
Phil looks up at him and smiles, maybe a little too giving.   
  
“What?” Dan asks, wary.  
  
“Nothing,” Karen smiles.  
  
Dan frowns, eyes flickering between them both as he brings his mug to his lips.   
  
“Weirdos,” he mutters to himself as he takes a long sip.  
  
Karen laughs, getting up to tend to the mugs in the sink, taking Dan’s out of his hand before he has a chance to put it back down and Dan looks over at Phil with a look of suspicion.  
  
Phil just smothers the palm of his hand over his jacket pocket, housing the photographic evidence of the only real weirdo sat here, hard proof of a particular trick or treating outfit. 

Of course, he’ll never tell Dan that. That’s just between him and Karen. For now, at least.

**Author's Note:**

> come say hi on tumblr !! @watergator


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